Thursday, August 6, 2015

Don't Stop Believing

I am a Journey fan.  For the record I am a "Steve Perry is the lead sing of Journey" fan.  Nothing against the gentleman the currently fronts the band..I am a purist about certain things and this is one of them.

I received Journey's Escape album for Christmas of 1981...on vinyl.  For those of you reading who have never seen an album on vinyl, you're a youngster!  I know every note of every song of that album.  Just about every song evokes memories of my teenage years.  My dream game show appearance would be Name That Tune, The Journey Edition.

In 2005 my White Sox won the World Series and Don't Stop Believing was a locker room staple for the team.  As a lifelong Sox fan, I have suffered through many terrible seasons but was magic.  The team tried to give the title away before the playoffs but the team didn't stop believing and as September 2005 came to a close, I swooped into the playoffs with my team and a handful of additional gray hairs!

Flash forward to January of 2015...after my diagnosis, I decided to go into my office and share the news with coworkers in person as opposed to emailing my news.  I have been with my company for almost 13 years and an email just didn't feel right.  I had slightly more energy on Monday January 19th when I got up to go to work.  The Zofran had allowed my appetite to return some and I was sleeping better with the help of Advil PM.

I don't remember many of the things that took place in the early days after my diagnosis but the memory of climbing into my car that morning is as vivid as if it happened yesterday.  I started my car and the radio came on.  I have no idea what station was on...

"Just a small town girl, living in a lonely world..."

I sing with the radio...I will admit it freely.  If I had a dime for every person that has busted me singing in my car, I could have retired in my 20s.  I broke into song that morning.  I was a member of Journey that morning.

"Working hard to get my fill...everybody wants a thrill."

"No, the movie never ends, it goes on and on and on and on."

In those moments in the arena in my mind sing with everything I had, I knew I was going to be OK.  Don't Stop Believing became my mantra.  I believed I was going to feel better, I believed that my doctors knew what to do, I believed in myself...I believed I was going to be OK...I BELIEVED I WAS GOING TO KICK CANCER'S ASS.

Don't stop believing, hold onto that feeling.

I wore that charm at every chemo treatment.  I have a bracelet with those words engraved on it. I know the lyrics of the song by heart and they will always hold a special place in my heart.  

Don't Stop Believing!!

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