Never Forget

16 years ago my life and the lives of every American changed forever.

It was a Tuesday.  The weather was stellar; here in Chicago and in Manhattan as well.

I woke up with a raging sore throat; the beginnings of a late summer cold.  I drove to work hosting a pity party for 1.

I worked in a tiny office with 8 other people.  I was the first in that morning.  I was there by myself when the first plane hit the towers in NYC.  Newscasters said it was a small plane.  The Fedex delivery arrived and I asked the driver if he had heard the news as he was bringing in the packages.  He hadn't and we chatted a bit as we listened to the radio report and I signed in our deliveries.  We were standing in the center of the office when the second plane hit.

To say that the late Barry Keefe from WTMX radio was stunned as he delivered this news is an understatement.  The Fedex guy said something must be really wrong as he left to continue his route.  I sat and waited for my co workers to arrive.

One of my co workers arrived with a tiny TV that she and her husband used on their boat.  One by one the rest arrived; in time to see one, then the other tower fall.  We sat in stunned silence most of the morning watching, trying to make sense of the unimaginable.

Jets into skyscrapers?!?!?!

16 years later I still cannot get my brain around it.

I remember driving the 30 miles home that afternoon.  My work commute took me up and down a major tollway in the Chicago area and I passed less than a dozen cars on my way home that day.  Surreal.

My exit for home was also the exit for O'Hare International airport.  By the time I reached it, airports across the country had been closed and flights in the US had been suspended.  The entrance to O'Hare had been closed off with movable concrete barriers that were being guarded by Chicago police with automatic weapons.  The skies were silent.  To someone who has lived in the take off/landing paths of a crazy busy airport, the lack of jet noise was deafening.

That evening, I went to church for a vigil and I prayed.  I am not much of a church goer but it felt like the right thing to do at the time.

Every 9/11 since 2001, I have reflected, prayed, mourned,  felt pain deeply in my soul.  But I have also felt that I have no right to feel this way because I didn't know anyone personally who perished in the attacks.

As time passed, and life went on, I found myself a changed person, living among other changed people.  We said hello to each other on the street, we held doors, merged more smoothly on the highway.  We became kinder.

I think often about the families of those killed that day and how their lives changed in the blink of an eye.  I am sure I am not the only one.

I put my flag out today.   I looked up at the cerulean sky and said a prayer...

For those lost 16 years ago
For their families
For those who have passed in the last 16 years from conditions brought on by the events of 9.11.01
For our country
For you
For me

This Sarah McLachlan song came up randomly on my playlist this morning.

I will remember you, will you remember me?
Don't let your life pass you by,
Weep not for the memories